Most Expensive: A tissue holder

So it comes to this. We could take the coin-covered gowns, and the car that whales unwillingly gave their penises to upholster, and the ’80s wine rack, and the switchplate but this…this is too much.

You know why Communism happened? The Tissue Pochette. This is exactly what everybody who bashed the capitalist system was ever talking about. This is a tissue holder. A tissue holder. Something so disposable they come free in plastic with a pack of tissues from the store. And this store wants $45 for it. The cost of four movie tickets and a date with the disabled guy in the back row. The cost of a week’s worth of groceries for a single person. For a tissue holder.

Suddenly, we have an overwhelming urge to stick a bayonet in a Tsar.